


Love Is The Correct Tense

by ImMoreThanThis



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, mentions of the other boys but not really relevant?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-15
Updated: 2013-04-15
Packaged: 2017-12-08 14:48:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/762597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImMoreThanThis/pseuds/ImMoreThanThis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been a while since Harry and Louis have seen each other. <br/>aka where Harry writes a note to Louis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Is The Correct Tense

**Author's Note:**

> Hiiii so this is my first AO3 posting... I don't really know what to say other than that this is a really personal work in which I am basically Harry so be nice I suppose?

I see someone around school that looks just like you.  
Your eyes,  
Your frown,   
Your wispy brown hair.   
Your walk,   
Your style,   
Your exaggerated smile.  
I know it’s too good to be true,  
Since you're so far away from this broken little town.  
There are miles between us today,   
But somehow, I feel like I’ve seen you.  
Through that ridiculous person who has the same face.   
Why?  
Why can’t you allow me to move on?  
Find a new best friend to lean on.  
Find someone who doesn’t look like you,   
Doesn’t act like you,   
And isn’t you.  
Maybe blonde,   
Brown eyes,   
A boring face.   
But I could never see myself loving someone who isn’t you.  
Love, what a strong word.  
It means so much,   
But yet so little at the same time.   
You were the one to tell me that.  
I remember smiling widely when I saw you walking towards me,   
Though you blatantly ignored my presence.   
Your eyes flickered across the room,   
But I wished they would have fallen on me,   
If only for a moment,   
Even if it was accompanied by a scowl or a dirty look.  
If you hated me,   
I don’t know how I’d deal.  
Actually,   
I wouldn’t deal.   
But then again,   
You actually did hate me for quite some time there.   
You never did tell me why.   
Scratch that,  
I don’t want to know why.   
If I did,   
Would I be disappointed?   
I believe so,   
At least that’s what I’ve convinced myself.  
If there wasn’t a reason…  
Never let me know,  
Okay?  
Everyone says you're doing well,  
But I’d like to see so for myself.   
See your face and make sure you're not falling to pieces like I am.  
I wouldn’t like that.   
But yet again,   
Who cares?  
You don’t. 

You wouldn’t care if I jumped off a bridge,  
Would you?  
Would your guilty conscience ruin you?  
Or would you not even spare me a second thought?  
That’s how things ended for us.  
You ran off with the girl, leaving me to fix the pieces of my broken heart.   
Why?  
Why couldn’t you have stayed?   
Or at least lied to me when I asked where you were going?  
Do you remember what you said?  
“Away from you.”   
The worst thing anyone could ever say to me.   
Thanks for that.   
I was fragile, you knew that.   
Hell, I still am fragile because of you.  
But I hate how people baby me,   
Like I'm breakable.   
Well,   
I am.   
I just wish I wasn’t.   
I’d rather be the big strong savior,   
Like the men in war movies.   
Why can’t you be the damsel in distress from this harsh world?  
I would sweep you off your feet and we would run away together.  
But you’re not a girl,   
And I'm not saving you.   
I'm the one that needs to be saved. 

She’s a lovely girl,   
Or so I hear.   
What’s her name?  
Eleanor?  
I thought you would go for someone with a prettier name than that.   
Maybe one that suits your last name.   
She sure doesn’t.   
She’s gorgeous,   
Don’t get me wrong,   
But she’s not who you should be with.  
Wanna know why?  
Because she’s not me.   
Whoops,   
I guess that secret is out of the bag now.  
Sorry about that.   
But it’s all good,   
Because by the time you read this,   
It’ll be too late by then. 

I know automatically that you just freaked out.  
No, I'm not killing myself,   
Or moving to some remote country where you’ll never be able to find me.  
No, it’ll be too late because this time I’ll be done with thinking of you.   
I wish there were some way to completely erase you from my mind.   
Forever.   
But do you know how to do that?  
I don’t.   
The only way I know how is by drugs,   
Or maybe some sort of voodoo shit,  
Even though I know neither of us believe in that.   
We were so much alike,   
You and I.   
Inseparable.   
Same sense of humor,   
Same goals in life,   
Same pass times,   
Same everything.   
People even confused our god damn names!  
And I assure you,   
Louis and Harry do not sound alike at all. 

Harry and Louis,   
Louis and Harry.   
Eleanor and Louis,   
Louis and Eleanor.   
I may be biased,   
But I think the first two sets sound better. 

Why can’t you come back to me?   
Come back to the backyard where we first met?  
The steps where we cried when your first girlfriend broke up with you?  
Though you were crying because your heart was broken,   
I was crying because of how sad you looked.   
I hated seeing you sad.   
Still do.   
Though I really don’t see you at all anymore.   
Blame the boys,   
They won’t let me near a picture of you,   
An old conversation,   
Or anything.   
They wanna make it seem like we never met.   
But how can you erase someone who was your world? 

My mother still doesn’t understand what happened.   
Why you all suddenly packed up and moved away.   
I really don’t either.   
But I miss Lottie and Fiz.   
And Daisy and Phoebe,  
And Jay.   
I miss your family.   
Do they miss me?   
I bet Lots does, since she has (or had?) that crush on me.   
Was she mad that you won’t speak to me anymore?  
I was thinking about requesting her to be my friend on facebook,   
Maybe we could have talked and she could see I'm not a bad guy,   
Despite what I assume you and Eleanor have told her. 

I hear the states are warmer than here?   
I bet you like that, you like t shirts more than I ever did.   
But you also liked sweaters,   
So I hope you're somewhere cold enough that you get to wear them.   
But I wouldn’t know,   
Would I? 

You left without me knowing.   
How the hell could you actually do that to me?  
I went to your house, hoping to maybe make things right,   
And do you know what was out front?  
A moving van.   
For the new family that lives there.   
It was awkward and they didn’t know where to point me because you didn’t leave a forwarding address.   
How could you?

I miss sitting in your bedroom and counting stars on the ceiling.   
You wanted to be a star,   
A singer,  
Famous.  
Are you achieving that dream where ever you are?   
I hope so.   
I wish you only the best in your life,   
Even though you basically ruined mine.   
But don’t you worry your pretty little mind,   
I don’t blame you for it. 

So have fun fucking your girlfriend,   
At least that’s what I think you’re doing.   
Don’t get her pregnant,   
You wouldn’t want to ruin your dreams.   
Stay carefree and always stay humble,   
Not that you wouldn’t anyways,   
Know there is always someone back home who loves you,   
Even if you don’t love her,   
Or me.   
Yeah me.   
I miss you.   
A lot.   
More than you would think for someone who broke my heart.   
Unintentionally of course. 

This is a hell of a lot longer than I wanted it to be.   
I just wanted to write out how much you hurt me and how much I wish I could change that.   
But it didn’t go that way,  
Did it?

 

So how do you end off a letter that you’re not sure will ever get to you.?  
I know Liam won’t send it,  
Probably not Zayn either.   
I might be able to con Niall into sending it,   
Only if he reads it first.   
But that would mean getting the truth out there.   
I don’t know if I actually want anyone to know I love you,   
Or loved.   
No,  
Love is the correct tense.   
I haven’t stopped loving you,   
Even if you’re with her.   
I apologize,   
This is the exact reason you left,   
To avoid me proclaiming my love.   
Sorry. 

So I’ll continue to watch the boy walking around school that looks like you,  
And maybe someday find someone else to love.   
I really hope I see your name in the magazines someday Lou.  
I just wish instead of Eleanor,   
It was me standing by your side.   
Well I hear Niall coming up the stairs to get me to go out tonight,   
So I think I should go.   
Ill try not to get too drunk,  
Because you always hated when I did.   
Goodbye Louis,   
Maybe I’ll see you again someday,   
Until then,   
I love you.   
-Harry.

**Author's Note:**

> There is a second part of this which I may post eventually... maybe... I don't know.


End file.
